Pinned doot

Please note I do not accept follow requests from people I haven't interacted with at all. That's why it's locked in the first place. It's a control measure after years of being burned by online strangers. I'd say it's nothing personal but that would be a lie. It is personal. I don't know you. Not even a sliver. Go away until we've talked first. And even then I might yet place a stay on making any formal decision on approval or dismissal. I'm happy to let requests sit eternally.

Pinned doot

Yes, hello, 1312. Land back. Indigenous style anarchy please.

This is an aggressively abolitionist account. I do not buy into the PIC, the MIC, the settler colonial state nor the fake concept of whiteness. I am also not a fan of retribution of any sort. I prefer recompense, equity and true freedom. Argue with your mother. I'm old and the only person imma baby is my actual child mmk? I AM NOT YOUR MAMMY. Pay me for my time, emotional labor and for the /usually/ gentle education and resources I provide (unless you've angered me and then just pay me for having to perceive your bullshit).

I don't want your broke, unspiced takes on issues that directly affect my marginalized to hell and back self and those who look like me across the world. We call it a diaspora (no relation to blogging service.) for a reason and we all are struggling in the same nonsense in different ways depending on location.

I am tired of y'all. On every platform including this one. :|

Pinned doot

If I don't caption something please know it's because I literally didn't have the spoons. I think in pictures and translating my feelings to text is often extremely difficult and frustrating for me. That's what I would have to do to caption a gif. It's often not going to happen. It's not laziness it's literally "brain no words good rn"

Omg can everyone fuck off about chucks already? They're shoes. They wear out. Wear them or don't! Sheesh.

The Yayarea urge to make friends with everyone who is also from this region originally. We just vibe. I love it.

Just found out my coworker is from San Leandro! HELL YEAH. LMAO

We were stuck on hold working on something and started whining about candlestick being gone. Sorry, love my team but fuck that new ugly ass ballpark. It's polluting the water with baseballs and harming wildlife and tickets cost too much. It's also literally built on top of trash and therefore stinky

Just want to remind y'all that if you post about piss on the birb site it is very clear you're amogus. Mind your pissposting people.

Finally learning to do my job correctly and I have no passion for it because of how little help I've had this whole time.

Frustrating because I'm looking for another job now due to how piss poorly they treat me.

Having a tough one.

I really should just become a hermit. I'm so fed up of other humans.

Venting, personal stuff, horrible family 

For her sake I hope the runes saying i'll be able to get this damn thing done are right. Our relationship is permanently fractured at this point though. I am absolutely horrified by what I'm seeing and I want nothing of it.

Show thread

Venting, personal stuff, horrible family 

I don't care how someone else chooses to live, it's not for me to decide or opine upon, but when it starts to impact me and everything riding on me getting my goals executed? I take issue with it. At that point you're a liability and a net negative.

I shouldn't have to literally lock my door and put on headphones to get things done and find sufficient quiet to concentrate. Stating that I want to be left alone and have no free time should be a baseline assumption until it is revoked when I keep saying it over and over again.

I don't want someone like that in my circle. Even on a tertiary basis. I'm super done.

Show thread

Venting, personal stuff, horrible family 

I should have seen this coming. She always apes everything I do. She has her own personality but still gloms onto mine. She inserts herself into everything. She makes poor decisions then is too embarrassed to tell me or anyone else until it gets really bad. She does drugs but won't take her meds. She doesn't care about things that negatively affect other people even though she thinks she does. Just...flat out ignores others needs and boundaries even with repetition.

Show thread

Venting, personal stuff, horrible family 

By this time next year, I will be in a place of my own, be it rented or owned and mortgaged. I will be at peace because I will finally be by myself and able to save towards my wedding and the cost of repatriation to another continent and country.

Show thread

Venting, personal stuff, horrible family 

I moved in here thinking I'd find peace from my absolutely untethered prior housemates; she's done nothing but interrupt and lie to me since even before I got here. I'm so livid it's not even funny.

They may have been difficult to live with. but they were objectively better people. I was still unsafe there tho.

Show thread

Venting, personal stuff, horrible family 

I am only this behind because of my cousin. I am absolutely furious at how many lies I was fed. I have been manipulated. You can be neurodivergent and manipulative too. Don't let anyone tell you that's not a thing.

Everyone who cares about me is pretty upset with her to the point my wife to be is willing to disinvite her from the wedding for me because I don't have the spoons to do it myself.

My best friend used the word psychotic about her behavior. He doesn't do that lightly. I take his opinions very seriously. It concerns me that he said that word in particular.

Show thread

Venting, personal stuff, horrible family 

When I get this minimal deliverable finished and pushed, I am going to take a nap.

I have to call in sick to work tomorrow to get this done. Work is the present. This bc is the future and will ensure I can take care of myself and my loved ones.

Cancer, death 

I am still crying about this. My uncle, my actual biological flesh and blood, died from this same illness. Every time another Black man dies from colon cancer I am retraumatized. I watched him waste away. I am severely not ok rn.

Show thread

We lost an icon today and my heart is sick over it. He's gone and he was barely older than me. Really inspiring figure in my life gone. Once again. This really stings.

We had a good run, fabulous hair command deck Worf pfp.

Unfortunately, Doja Cow is just more important always. Gotta rep my favorite birthday twin.

Besides. Cows are amazing. Need more holstein print in my life.

I'm having a genuinely hard time understanding why she's being pissy about something so small.

I think she's more upset about that fight with her friend ending the way it did than she realizes and taking it out on me. I'm going to just ignore it. I don't think she's actually angry at me.

I genuinely am grumpy, my stomach hurts, which makes me short of patience. I should communicate that.

Show thread

Kinda glad my partner hates federated social media. I need somewhere to complain freely.

She got angry/overreacted because I told her that I don't do woodwork in a closed space after she stated that she wants a woodworking shed, I replied that I thought it was weird that she knew that I PERSONALLY don't do that because of sawdust (my dad owned a carpentry business when I was a kid, I was his only employee besides himself) and she says "OK I'm going back to baking bread. Good luck (auf Deutsche) with coding."

I literally have constant risk of a lung collapsing and I wasn't correcting her. I just personally don't do that. I just said that /I/ do not work with wood in a closed space. I don't understand why that was upsetting enough to walk away?

Also, she is going to forget she ever wanted this later. I'm the one paying for everything, she is not thinking this through. Do you want a film studio or do you want a carpentry shed? I'm not doing both. 😠

The more I learn and successfully deploy the more stupid I feel. Amazing.

Show older
is not alive

timeline's always dead 'round these parts