treadmill escapades to figuratively flee future financial woes

Cuba isnt free until they have the anti horny corn cereal product on ever grocery store shelf

HELLO FOOT FETISH ARTIST. I'D LIKE TO COMMISSION A PICTURE OF *HANDS* PLEASE

couldn't sleep but the sunrise makes it worth it c:

using your oven in an apartment is an exercise in how quickly you can turn off fire alarms

even after cleaning the kitchen, i still feel unfulfilled

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is not alive

"are you a boy or a girl?"
"im dead!"